In Ontario there is no legal requirement to get divorced unless you or your spouse would like to remarry.  Some people decide to remain married for their children or for financial reasons and whatever choice you and your spouse make, you should always do what you think is right for both parties.

In Canada there are three grounds for divorce that constitute the Breakdown of the marriage.

Paragraph 8 (2) of the Divorce Act states that "Breakdown of the marriage" is established only if:

(1) the spouses have lived separate and apart for at least one year immediately preceding the determination of the divorce proceeding and were living separate and apart at the commencement of the proceeding; or

(2) the spouse against whom the divorce proceeding is brought has, since the celebration of the marriage:

(a) committed adultery, or

(b) treated the other spouse with physical or mental cruelty of such a kind as to render intolerable the continued cohabitation of the spouses.


If you do decide to get a divorce you should know that you do not have to appear in court.  Court appearances are reserved for complex divorce proceedings involving issues around support, child support, custody, assets, and so on.  With the increasing costs of lawyers, the Family law Support Team is here to guide you if you do decide to self represent.

So you have decided to get a divorce and terminate your marriage.  Or perhaps your spouse has made this decision.  Well there were just over 26,000 divorces in Ontario in 2001, the last year divorce statistics are available for.  This number has remained steady over the past decade so the first thing you need to do is accept your situation and realize you are not alone.

Unfortunately many marriages end in divorce and the important thing to remember is that life continues and you get to take all the lessons and memories (both good and bad) with you.  No matter what brought about the end of your marriage, you need to start focusing on resolving the divorce and separation so you can move forward with your life. Now is not the time to get caught up in the past or the drama of revenge.  Take control, and resolve to get through the emotions and logistics that have arrived in your life.  If you are self litigating the Family Law Support Team is here to help you.  If you have a lawyer or want one, make sure you find someone you can trust and have a good rapport with.

The first question you need to ask is if you are having a contested or uncontested divorce?

Your next steps will depend on if you are negotiating a settlement out of court with your spouse or if you are having a contested divorce in the court system. If you are negotiating with your spouse out of court then you are working on a separation agreement.  This is a legally binding contract that defines your legal rights and obligations arising from your separation.

It is a contract enforceable in the court of law.  If you find yourselves in the court process you can still agree on a separation agreement at anytime further along the process.  Ideally, you can settle your divorce quickly and fairly.  If you are having an uncontested divorce with few assets to equalize and no children than the process become much cheaper and easier.  Usually this is when the grounds for divorce is a one year separation, and the issues of child custody and access, support, and property division have been resolved by a separation Agreement, court order, oral agreement or in some other manner.  However, this is often not the case.

Option 1:

The Separation Agreement(Outside of Courts)

To draft a separation agreement with your spouse you must negotiate one.  This can be done one-on-one with your spouse, it can be done through both of your lawyers, or through an agreed upon mediator, or in a collaborative setting.  It is important that both of you are aware of each other's financial situation and the appropriate financial history and records are required to be truthfully presented to each other.  Once the both of you have reached agreement, it can be formalized in a separation agreement before which it should be reviewed by legal professionals trained in Ontario Family Law.

Option 2:

Inside of Courts

The Court process in Ontario is regulated by the family court laws and follows a formal procedure.  The system is designed to get you and your spouse to settle.

1. The first thing that you need to do is fill out an Application for Divorce and Financial Statement. This application details what you want the court to give you, and why. For example, you may request child custody, child support, spousal support and a division of property.  We workshop this form and the correct language to use at our seminars and workshops. If there are financial issues involved in your divorce, and there almost always is, you will need to draft a financial statement outlining your income, assets, ect.

Once you have completed the Application for Divorce you must Issue the Application, then Serve and File the Application and your Financial Statement. You issue the application in the family law court of the jurisdiction where your children reside (or in the jurisdiction where you reside if there are no children).  The court will then assign you a file at which point you are obliged send your application and financial statement to your spouse. This is done through a process server or through sending the documents to your spouse's lawyer.  Following this you will will complete an affidavit for service with the court.  As you can see this process is formal and complex.


2. After you file the application and serve your spouse they have 30 days to file an answer.  The answer will be your spouse's response to your application, and any claims he or she will make of their own.  Your spouse will include their financial statement at this step and they will both be filed with the court along with an affidavit.

3. At this point you will have 10 days to serve and file a reply.  The reply is optional.  It is used when you disagree with anything in the spouse's answer and it allows you to answer any new claims that your spouse may have drafted in his/her answer.

4. Congratulations.  You have now reached the case conference stage.  At the case conference you and your spouse (plus lawyers if you have one) will meet with a judge for the first time and narrow down the issues in your case.  You will deal with such matters as temporary orders for your children's concern, and the appointment of the children's lawyer.  Issues such as disclosure and scheduling will often come up at this point in the process.

5. At this point in your case you and your spouse will exchange and gather all information needed to support and disprove each other's arguments.  This stage may include psychological assessments and custody assessments if needed and this often takes significant time.

6. Motions are often used at this point in your case to resolve issues that can not wait. For example, if your spouse is not paying you spousal support that you need to survive, then you can bring a motion. Motions can also be brought to dispute what you need to provide to your spouse.

7. The Settlement Conference is the next step in family law divorce proceedings and it is an attempt to resolve your case and preventing it from going to trial. At a settlement conference a judge will meet with you and your spouse to try and get a settlement to occur.  You do not need to wait for a settlement conference to make a settlement offer with your spouse.

8.  Most divorce proceedings rarely reach the Trial stage. If you allow your case to reach this stage then you have probably spent a lot of emotional energy, time and money to resolve your conflict.  You are also allowing a complete stranger (The Judge) to determine your fate.  The trial stage is very formal and can take many months to complete.  It is usually in your best interest to avoid dragging out your divorce to this length. If you do and you are self litigating, you need all the help you can get.  It is possible to win as a self litigant but it will take dedication.  If you have reached this stage and are without a lawyer we highly recommend you use the discounted services of the Family Law Support Team and attend one of our seminars or workshops.  We will guide you in an appropriate strategic direction and help you understand your decisions and possible outcomes.